Virtuous Daughters

I know after what I wrote about what role I believe our parents have in our lives concerning our future marriage relationship, a lot of you are probably wondering or thinking, ”well, what role do you think WE play in all of this? After all, isn’t it OUR marriage?” And to this I will answer you “Yes, I do believe we have an important part, too!” J

You see, I do believe that our parents have an especially important part in our future mates.  In fact, I am all for my parents actually picking out, choosing and arranging my marriage.  I can just hear you all grasping for breath! “What?!” Yes, you heard me right! I think we would all be a whole lot better off if they did the choosing, and in a lot of other countries and cultures, this is exactly how it is done. 

But, I realize that this isn’t the norm anymore, so I will try to explain what I believe our role is where marriage is concerned (and yes, my father allows us to decide whether we marry someone or not).  But, I think there is a lot of wisdom in allowing and seriously letting our parents do the choosing for us. 

Anyhow…what do I believe our role is?  I believe the number one thing that we as young (and older) people need to do is to be COMPLETELY open and honest with our parents where relationships are concerned! Girls, this means sharing with them what you may be thinking or struggling with.  I have not always been open, and in fact, I find it extremely trying at times to be open.  As much as anyone will tell you that I am out-going, talking about things that are very personal to me is very hard for me to do.  I don’t open up very easily.  So no, this does not come naturally for me, as some may assume or think, so I feel for those of you who are like me!  Yet, if there is one thing that God has been teaching me, it is that I need to be open and completely honest with how I am feeling, what I am thinking and what I am struggling with, with my parents.

When we are open and honest with our parents, it helps them with knowing how to pray for us, how to guide us, and how to protect us.  Think about it.  If your parents don’t know what you are struggling with, how can they protect you from harm?  What about if you are struggling with your feelings for someone of the opposite sex?  I know a lot of you are thinking “You don’t understand, my parents wouldn’t understand me”, and that is where I am going to tell you that you are VERY WRONG!  Your parents understand you a lot more than you give them credit for.  I can not tell you enough, how freeing being open with your parents can be. 

Being a female myself, I too have struggled with my feelings for others, on more than one occasion.  And I found as I sat down and poured my heart out to my mother and told her honestly how I felt, she was able to listen to me, and talk with me about it.  I felt so much better after opening up and sharing with her how I honestly felt.  I have done the same with my father, as well.  God gave us our parents, dear girls, to be there for us and to guide us through this time.  I will be the first to tell you, singlehood is no easy road! In fact, it has been down right hard at times…and it doesn’t get any easier, the older you get!  And yes, you will probably struggle with your feelings at times, too, atleast if you are human. J  That is a part of life.  The key is not if we struggle, but how will you respond to those struggles? What will you do about them? Will you guide how you feel, or will your feelings guide you?

This is why it is so important to talk, talk and talk some more with your parents! Let them hold you accountable! Let them know how to pray for you, how to guide you.  Don’t sit back and let them think that you have it all together, when deep down inside of you, you realize that you are struggling with something, yet trying to either ignore it or hide it.  Doing either one won’t get you anywhere.  By talking about it, will make you aware of it, and will make you deal with it.  Maybe those feelings are from God.   But how will you ever know, without talking to your parents about it? For all you know, your parents believe this is of God, too.  Or maybe, they know something that you don’t.  Either way, you need to be open and honest with them, and my friends, don’t just be open and honest with them! You need to also heed and follow their direction and guidance, too, as hard as this may be at times.

The other main area that I see that we play in is the fact that we need to be friendly to the opposite sex, as well.  Girls, I am at fault here.  I can not tell you how badly I have been where this is concerned. We think that since we need to guide how we feel about the opposite sex, how we believe in courtship/betrothal (one or the other or both), that we need to completely ignore the opposite sex, and this is wrong!  God said to treat them as our brothers in Christ! He never said to treat them like some criminal!  We think that since we don’t believe in or want to flirt, that we should just completely ignore them.  We don’t want to draw their attention to us, so unless were spoken to, we ignore them.  Girls, I have been there, done that.  I have literally ignored them, as I have seen many other girls do.  I look at some girls, who can’t seem to stop flirting, and I think “I don’t want to be like them!” so instead, I go to the opposite pendulum, and ignore them.  I say, neither is Godly. We should not flirt or make our brothers stumble in any way, shape or form; yet, we also should not ignore them, either.  A lot of us are simply afraid of becoming too close to them, are afraid of liking them too much or something, so we go to the opposite extreme, and ignore them.  While, the other group is afraid of being single for the rest of their lives or something, so they try to snag a man by flirting with them.  I say, neither is correct.

What I want to encourage you young ladies to do is to be friendly with them, to treat them like your brothers…to be a happy medium kind of girl.  Don’t flirt, but don’t ignore them, either.  Be willing to talk to them, to be friends with them.  Don’t get too personal with them, yet be friendly with them.  No, I don’t believe you should talk intimately with them, yet I think you still need to be friendly with them.  Treat and think of them as brothers. Nothing more…nothing less. For isn’t that what they are, your brothers in Christ? So let’s treat them with respect, honor, and with a Godly sisterly kind of love.  AND BE OPEN WITH YOUR PARENTS! I can NOT stress this enough to you! This is SO important, friends.  Let your parents know just how you feel about someone.  Be honest with them, and be honest with yourselves.  This is as much as a protection to you, as it is to allowing them to see into your hearts.

The other role that I believe we have, which I guess is kind of the same role that I spoke of before about being open and honest with how we feel with our parents, is when our parents do bring someone up to us, in regards to marriage, be open and honest with them about your thoughts and concerns, and listen to theirs.  Girls, as much as I do believe you have the final say-so, I want to really encourage you to honestly highly regard what your parents tell you.  Regard their thoughts and feelings with high esteem.  If they come to you with someone that they really believe you should marry, yet it isn’t someone that you honestly ever pictured yourself with, don’t just mark them off.  I want you to listen to them, talk to them about it, and PRAY about it! You be real careful about just marking them off.  For all you know, that IS who God wants you to marry! Take your parents seriously, and seriously consider everything they say.  And remember, love is not a feeling, but a choice.  We choose to love someone.  It is an action from a choice that we have chosen.

Let’s pray:

“Dear Yahweh, I ask that you would please be with us through this time of singleness. Father, help us to know how to react to the opposite sex.  Father, please help us to overcome our inability to open up and be open and honest with our parents.  Father, I realize that sometimes it just does not come natural to us, but Father, I also know that this is your will for us, and I ask that you would be with each one of us, and help us to learn how to open ourselves up to them, so that they would be able to help us and guide us…and not only that, my Lord, but that they would also know how to pray for us.  Father, I realize that this time is not always easy for us or them, but I ask that you would bless each one of us as we await your divine will, and that you would give us the strength and the wisdom that we need. Keep us under the protecting, loving hands of our parents.  Show us what you want us to do, how to react and respond to those around us, and I also pray that you would help us all to be a blessing to all of our brothers in Christ, Father.  Help us to be able to minister and bless them, too, my Lord.  I ask that you would also be with them, for I know that this time isn’t easy for them, either. I ask that you would be with all of us and just give us the wisdom and strength that we need through this time.  Thank you, my Lord.  Thank you for being willing to bless us with such wonderful parents! Amen.”

As I was praying about what subject to write about, Yahweh laid upon my heart to speak about the different roles and areas where relationships (or preparing for marriage), are concerned.  I am in no where perfect in this area, and I am still learning a great deal about this very subject, but I thought I could atleast share with you what my thoughts are, and also what I myself have learned, where this subject is concerned.

So, over the next little while, I will be writing different things about relationships, the role our parent’s play, the role we ourselves play, the roles we play concerning our younger siblings, different ways we can be preparing for that day, and some questions we can ask each other when that day arrives.  I would love input and thoughts from all of you and what you think/feel/believe about this, too, so PLEASE feel free to comment or email me with what you think! I would love to hear from all of you!

Let’s dig in, shall we?

Relationships and our parents:

Ah, this was a hard one for me for years!  I was willing to allow my parents to lead me in many, many areas, but for some odd reason, I pulled back from this one area for a long time.  I could trust my beloved parents in every area of my life, but, this one was a troubling one for me to give over to them.  After all, what if they chose someone that I didn’t care for? Or, what if they chose someone that I couldn’t see being my lifelong mate?  I mean, how would they really know what I needed? Wouldn’t I know better when it came to my life long mate, than they would? The questions were endless in my mind.  Yet, how many of us younger people (or older ones!) think just like this?  Why is this, an area that we find so difficult to give up to them and trust them in?

 I look back in history, and Godly children were always willing to trust their parents, and not only willing to trust them in this very important area of their life, but they WANTED to trust them with this in this area of their life! They saw the importance in the role that their parents played in their lives, and they also saw the protection that their parents could give them, as let’s face it, my friends, our parents have been around a whole lot longer than we have, and not only that, but they know us better than we ourselves often do, and they can see things that we are just not capable of seeing.  They see the dangers or blessings in different relationships, and because God gave them that ability, they can also shield us from making the worse decision of our life!  For what could be worse, than choosing a life’s mate, that isn’t the right one? (Yes, I know salvation is THE very most important decision, but other than that, I believe our life mate is the next most important decision we will ever make).  As the saying goes “It would be better to spend one day with the right one, then a thousand with the wrong one”.

How many of us have seen young people marry someone that were not meant for them? How many of us have seen marriages that have struggled from day one because they didn’t heed the wisdom of their aged parents? And how many of us have seen children go against the blessing and will of their parents, go against the guidance that their parents gave them, thinking that they knew best, only to later realize (when it was too late), that their parents were right, right from the start? I think we can all raise our hands to this question, for this is not uncommon!! 

I think back to scripture.  How many children were extremely blessed for following their parents when it came to finding and marrying a girl/man?  Think about it.  Isaac trusted his father, who then trusted his servant, to not only go find his life mate, but to also bring her to him and have him marry her, without him knowing anything about her!  He married her, because he knew and trusted his father, and if his father was for that marriage, then so was he and he would then make it work (Gen. 24-25).  You could say he married her blindly, but look at their marriage? Was he not blessed for marrying Rebekah?  Look at Jacob.  He listened to his parents advice as to where to go (even though in his situation, his parents were unable to go with him – but they still gave him the guidance and direction as to where and who to marry), and look at the blessing he received (Gen 28-29)?  Look at Ruth.  She was so blessed by following Naomi, and her son was in the linage of Christ!  And I must say that she had a whole lot more trust in her mother-in-law, than a lot of us do in our own mothers…and that is sad, but it is also true.  How many of us would have gladly obeyed the voice of her mother-in-law??  Yet, look at the blessing that God blessed her with, because of her obedient heart!  She was incredibly blessed because of obeying and heeding the wisdom of Naomi (Ruth 3-4)!

Then we can see others in scripture like Esau and Samson who went against their parents or simply “told” or “ruled” their parents (told them who they were going to marry and told their parents to “go fetch them and bring them unto me”.  Esau decided to marry someone he knew his parents would not and did not approve of, and look at his family.  They have been at war with God and God’s children, ever since (Genesis 28).  Then we have the story of Samson.  He commanded his father to get him a Philistine for his wife, instead of trusting his father to choose someone that God would be pleased with.  Neither case, I might add, came our favorably (Judges 14:2-3).

*If you would like a lot more every day situations about stories of children that went against the wisdom of their parents and regretted it later, read the book on “Friendships” by Michael Phillip, as he wrote an entire book of testimonies on this very subject.*

So we see both sides of the coin in scripture, and with many other scenarios, but these are the ones that came to my mind, when I was thinking about this subject.

So let me ask you, are you going to be blessed because of your obedient heart and by following the wisdom of your parents, or are you going to be cursed because of disobeying your parent’s wisdom?  Guys, our parents were put over us, because God knew they would be the ones that we needed!  And before you start saying “You don’t know my father! He isn’t a believer!”  I want to stop you right there! GOD WILL STILL LEAD THROUGH YOUR FATHERS!!!! And if your fathers don’t want to play the role that God gave them, then whoever is playing the role as your father, is the one that you are to trust through this, like in any other area.  But, let me first state that God does and will, lead through your parents, regardless as to whether or not they are believers or not!  Did God not lead through the couple that was over Hudson Taylor’s life?  Yes, at first he said “No way!”  So, the couple, choosing to abide under the leadership of the parents over them, chose to break off their relationship.  They were not going to go against their parents.  They were pretty smart!  And, they also knew that if this was indeed God’s will for their life, God would soften her parents or guardian’s heart, and they would be married.  And do you know what?  He later told Hudson to go marry her!  Wow! Can you imagine?!  Hudson must have been unspeakably happy and blessed! Yes, it was hard for him to decide not to marry her, because they didn’t have their parent’s blessing, but look how God blessed them?  Now they could be married, WITH their parents blessing! 

Now, incase you think this is just the “olden” days, I want to share a testimony of a man that I myself knew, a few years ago.  He isn’t that much older, than I myself am.  This man came to the USA from India, and was also a believer.  His father I believe was Hindu.  He knew that his father must choose who he was suppose to marry, and he also knew that God would lead through his father, as He always had in the past.  He simply asked his father to please choose a strong Godly young lady, as he was a believer.  But, he left it up to his father and trusted God to lead through him.  All he had to do, was stay under the blessing and protection of his father.  He father sent him a letter telling him that he had his wife, and when the wedding was going to be.  Yes, this man went back to India, never having met his wife, and married her!  People were shocked! How could he?  They didn’t even know each other?!  Yet, they understand a principle, that many, many people simply to not even grasp. That principle is “Love is a choice, not an emotion”.  They didn’t have to know each other, to love each other.  They had decided to trust their parents, and thus they decided to “choose” to love each other, because they realized that love was a choice.  They could choose to love them, or they could choose not to, the choice was theirs.  They choice to make it work, and work they have! They are a beautifully married couple to this day, with quite a few children now.  Yes, they have been extremely happy and blessed because of their decision.

So let me ask you again, are you willing to trust your parents? Maybe your parents won’t ask you what this couple’s parents did.  Maybe your parents have other customs.  Maybe your parents will agree completely with you, and who you think you should marry.  But, maybe they won’t.  It really doesn’t matter.  The question is, will YOU do what is scripturally correct, and follow your parents to the end?  Let God lead through your parents…and thus bless you because of your obedience to them.  Guys, we all know what scripture says, regardless as to how we may feel.  God tells us to obey our parents.  He tells us it WILL go right with us, if we do.  It all comes down to us.  He will do His job at leading them.  But, will we do our job in following them?

Let’s pray…

“Dear Heavenly Father, we come before you and ask you to help our unbelief.  Father, we know Your divine will is to follow our parents, yet we also know our weakness in doing so.  We see the many people that were either blessed or cursed for either obeying or disobeying their parents.  Father, we want your blessing in our lives! We ask that you would not only help us to follow our parents, and thus follow You, but we also ask that you would be with our parents and give them the wisdom that they need, where this important area is concerned.  Father, we need you to help us to trust not only You, but those You have richly blessed us with.  Help us to give this important area over to them and to patiently wait.  Keep us all pure as we wait for You to show us Your will through them, dear Father.  Keep us all strong and encouraged in You.  I ask this in Your Son’s precious and holy name, Yahshua.  Amen.”

I don’t have long, but I wanted to let you know that I haven’t forgotten you and I haven’t fallen off the face of the earth, either! I’ve just been very busy this spring, and just haven’t had a whole lot of time for the computer lately. I will try to post soon, though!

I also wanted to let those of you know, who are looking forward to the notification being set up, that I just can’t do it.  I have tried, but apparently there is something wrong with the coding, and it just keeps erroring out on me…and I haven’t found another one that I can use with WordPress.  But if I do find one, I will try to set it up for you!

Until next time…

Yahweh bless, Samantha

Hello Girls,

I just wanted to let you know that I was finally able to get playlist working on my site! I have it set to auto start, but if you find that you would rather it not, but would instead like to choose to start it yourself, please let me know! I can have it set either way. You can also choose to have it not play, simply by hitting the pause button on the player (on the lower right of site).

I also wanted to let those of you who have been waiting for the email notification pluggin, that I HAVE been working on it! I thought I had it all set and ready for you to be able to use, but there is something wrong with the coding. I am contacting support right now, and will try to get this up and running as time allows.  Thank you so much for your patience!

Yahweh bless,

Samantha

Have you have ever gone through some really difficult trials in your life? Well, I certainly have, and I think just about everyone has, to one degree or another.

One thing that God has been teaching me a lot about, is even when we are going through different trials and we don’t understand why things are happening, it is still important to thank Him and praise Him for them.

In 1 Thessalonians 5:18 it says, “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Yahshua concerning you.”  Yet, how many of us are only willing to give thanks to God when things are going our own way? How many of us actually thank God for a TRIAL in our life? Yet, what does God say? He says to give thanks in EVERYTHING, for this is the will of God concerning YOU! Just because you are sick or just going through a really difficult time in your life, doesn’t mean that God is any less of a Heavenly Father.  He is God no matter when, how or where things happen.  He is still in complete control.  And He still loves you! 

Whether we understand the reason for the trial or not, God does, and we still need to trust Him, knowing that “all things work together for good” (Rom. 8:28).  And dear brethren, that doesn’t mean that God promises you that He will do what you want.  God says He knows what is best for you, and He will do it, period.  The question is, are you willing to be used of God?  Are you willing to go through whatever it is that God is going to allow to happen (or allowing to happen right now), and praise Him for it, regardless as to the circumstances? Or is our thanks and praise circumstantial?

I want to share with you a testimony about a dear friend of mine.  She was recently diagnosed with Leukemia APL (this past week).  She is a wife and wonderful mother of five young children.  When they first told her that she had Leukemia, she was filled with fear…and who wouldn’t be?  She didn’t understand why in the world God was allowing this to horrible thing to happen.  Then last night as she was pouring her heart out to her Heavenly Father, she realized something.  Nothing could or would happen, that wasn’t God’s will for her life.  He wasn’t going to let her go through something that He hadn’t already agreed to.  This was His will for her life and He was using her to bring glory to Himself.  Then she also realized that she didn’t have to understand the whys about it, but the one thing that God has commanded for her to do, is to trust Him in all things, and to praise and thank Him for each and every little (and big!) thing that takes place in her life…and so that is what she is going to do! And do you know what? She is now thankful for this cancer.  She is now thanking God for being willing to use her in such a way as this. No, she still doesn’t understand it all.  Yes, she understands this is going to be a painful battle.  Yet, she knows her God is still on the throne and he still loves her! His love is NOT circumstantial! It is forever!

Now let me ask you something.  If you were told that you had Leukemia, could you too, sit down and thank and praise God for it? Talk about complete surrender to her Lord and Saviour!  Talk about a child’s trust…she doesn’t have to worry.  She doesn’t have to be afraid of what she is going through.  She knows her Heavenly Father is in complete control, and she trusts Him through this, just as a little child trusts her earthly father for bread.

Now, a lot of us will never get this kind of news or have to go through such a hard trial as battling cancer.  But, what about different trials that you are or may be one day facing?  Are you struggling with something right now?  If so, can you kneel down and actually thank Him for it, knowing that everything will be in accordance to His will for you and that He is there with you, and will take care of you? Or will your thankfulness be circumstantial – in other words, you will only thank Him when things are going your own way and you agree with it?

Recently I too, went through a trial.  I didn’t understand it either. But, as I knelt down and began to thank God for it, because I knew He deserved my thankfulness and praise regardless as to how I felt, God began to show me one thing after another that this trial had brought me and I began to realize that God was right! It WAS for my good! Yes, it has been hard! But, I wouldn’t have wanted to trade it for anything, because I realize that as much as it is hard going through it, it was for my good, and there is a lot of blessing that has come out of it all. And when I changed my attitude from “I can’t believe You are allowing this to happen!” to “Thank you dear Father for this trial.” It was amazing the outcome!

How often do we go through trials, and learn nothing from them?  Do you waste those trials? God is always trying to teach us something, but we have to be willing to learn.  Trials and tribulations are just one of the ways He uses to teach us different things.  This is our training.  And my dear friends, whether or not you understand the reasons for it or not, doesn’t change one fact…you are still required to thank Him for each and every one of them!

May you dear sisters also learn the blessing that comes from a thankful and willing heart!

Dear Friends,

 I am so sorry for my absent leave without letting anyone know about it. I was called out of state on April 29th, as a dear little friend of mine was passing away. (How I miss you, Sarah!)  She passed away on May 6th at 3:15am. Please do keep the family in your prayers!

 I just got back a couple of days ago and just need a few days to recuperate, before I will once again begin to write, so please bare with my absent for a little bit longer.

Samantha

Someone had written me and asked me about setting someting up so that they could get email notifications when I write a new post.

I haven’t forgotten about you, and I am looking into it.  Hopefully I will be abel to figure out how to get this up and running soon, although it may take me some time to figure it out. But, I am trying, so you should be able to do this shortly.  I’ll let you all know when I have it uploaded and working correctly.

Until then,

Samantha

“We love, because he first loved us.”

The past little while has been really hard for me.  I have found something out…love hurts.  Sure, I knew it before, but lately I guess, it has become so blatantly obvious to me.

A few mornings ago found me in tears, talking to my dear mother about just how hard loving was.  A little friend of mine, who is battling cancer, was having a lot of trouble, and trying to fight an infection, and it became obvious to me that I may just loose her.  Yes, she may pull through it yet, but I guess it really hit home that I could loose her.  I love her so much!  It just broke my heart in two to know that our time with her could be running out. 

I remember looking at my mom with tears in my eyes telling her “Mom, sometimes I hate the fact that I love people so much!” I am usually a person that is all or nothing…and typically, it is all. And in this case especially, I couldn’t help but pour myself into this little girl.  I looked at Mom and said “You know, I now realize just why doctors and nurses are told to keep an emotional distant between themselves and their patient, especially in the cancer ward”.  I’ve never been able to do that.  But you know, at that minute, I so wished I could! I was tired of being hurt because I lost the person that I had learned to love so very, very much.  It was costing me a great deal, and I didn’t really like it.

Mom just looked at me and told me something to the extent of “Samantha, you wouldn’t want to be anything other than that. God wants us to be able to love others.  Love isn’t a bad thing.”   I knew that she was right and that I didn’t want to change the fact that I love others like I do. I love loving others.  But you know, this is exactly how I felt for a little while. Was it really worth all the pain it was costing me? Is it worth constantly being hurt because of it? You know, many people don’t love others, especially those they hardly even know.  Yet, here I was, in love with so many, especially in the cancer ward, and here I was a couple of mornings ago, sitting their with tears streaming down my face, as I had sat on my bed the night before, with my heart breaking…once again.

You know, something came to me after my talk with Mom.  If here I am hurting because of my love for a little special someone, how much greater does God hurt for me?  You know, love cost God his sons’ life! He loved me that much, that He was willing to not only give up His life, but give it up in the most brutally way, just because He loved me THAT much!  He suffered and died, just because of His love for me! 

Here I am, suffering in such a small comparison, compared to what He did for me, and I want to give in to it! Yet, that wasn’t what Christ did…He knew it was going to hurt to love me, yet He did it anyway.  He didn’t care how much it hurt Himself, He still loved me unconditionally.  So how much less should I be willing to do the same for others? 

Yes, my dear ones, loving someone can be painful at times.  Very painful. Yet, that doesn’t matter.  God has called us to love, and to love regardless as to the cost.  The question is, can you love unconditionally, too?  Will you only love if it doesn’t cost you anything? Or will you choose, like Christ did, to love regardless of the price tag?

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever

believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”

John 3:16

“Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one

that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God.” 

1 John 4:7

I pray that you will choose to love others, not because you want to, not because you like to, but because God first loved you and so you are going to CHOOSE to! I pray that you will make a conscience decision to love those around you, because it is the right thing to do. Yes, sometimes love will hurt, but you know what, that doesn’t matter…God loved us, and has asked us to love others in return. So my friends, let’s follow God’s example and CHOOSE to love those around us, regardless. Love them unconditionally, because that is how God loves us! He will be with us all as we do this, and will give us the strength for the difficult times we may face.  But don’t take the cowardly way out and choose not to love, simply because it will sometimes hurt. It will only hurt yourselves and you will miss out on the great blessings that God has in-store for you!

I know I wrote about my journey and a little bit about how fulfilling my single years have been, but today I want to write and ask you all some questions about yours.

I know that some times we can get overwhelmed during these years and even get pretty discouraged about the whole thing.  Will we ever be blessed with a family of our own? Will we ever have a man to walk down life’s road with? We watch as year after year slips on past us, and we can’t help but face these questions time and time again.  Satan likes to fill us with discouraging thoughts and keep our minds occupied with things, other than what God would have us thinking.  And this is why I want to ask you some questions.  To try to bring your minds back to what God wants us doing, what God wants us thinking, etc.  You better get a piece of paper ready with a pen in your hands, as I want you to personally take the time to reflect back and answer these questions one at a time.  Are you ready? J

1.     Reflect back over this past year and list some of the ways that God has been able to use you to serve in.  List the top 10 or so things that you can think of.

2.    Now go back and reflect on all the things that you did this past year that you wouldn’t have been able to do, had you had a family of your own. (Ways that you were able to serve God with singleness of heart).

3.    Would there have been a lack, a need that wouldn’t have been fulfilled, had you not been there to fulfill it?

4.    Now I want you to read over all that you have written.  If you are like me, you will see there are so many things that you didn’t even think about before. Ways that God has used you to serve Him, that He wouldn’t have been able to, had you had a family to take care of. 

Girls, I want you to dwell on this for a minute.  Doesn’t that bring you such joy that you can not even explain?? Doesn’t that give you such fulfillment, knowing you were able to serve God in ways that you would never have been able to?  Doesn’t it give you such joy to know that God needed YOU to fulfill those needs for HIM?  I know it does me!  Everytime I get discouraged about being single, all I have to do is look back at all that I have been able to do for Him, and my discouragement vanishes, for I know that God has been able to use me in such a way that I wouldn’t have been able to be used in, otherwise.  God didn’t intend for our single years to be wasted with us feeling sorry for ourselves! No, far from it! He has work that only we as singles can do and He needs singles that are willing to step up and take that role that we were supposed to be walking in already! Look around you at what needs there are and see just how many of them you can fulfill during these precious years that God has given you.  Maybe it is just a sibling that needs more one on one time.  Maybe there is something that your father needs you to do.  Maybe it is something that someone else needs your help in.  What ever it may be, don’t think for one second that we as singles are not important, for we are VERY important in God’s eyes and He needs us, my friends!

So I challenge you today to look around you and find something today that God needs you to fulfill.

May we each live our lives to their fullest for Him and may we never regret this time that God has blessed us with!

Have you ever had a prayer answered, yet you didn’t even realize that God had answered it? Well, today I realized that I did, and in a profound way, too!

For years now I have always had a love for cancer patients, although I really didn’t know any at the time.  I have just always longed to go to a hospital and play with these children, laugh with them, sing to them, read to them, and just be with them and their families through those rough days.  I even looked into volunteering at a cancer ward in a hospital about 45 miles south of me, but due to gas prices, I was just never able to do it. Yet, deep within my heart or hearts, I have always longed to reach out to these dear little ones.

This past year (May of 2008), my family received a phone call that a friend of ours, that their 3 year old daughter was just diagnosed with Leukemia +ALL.  It is one of the worse types of Leukemia out there.  It just broke our hearts.  My mom got off the phone with tears in her eyes as she told us the news.  Dad gathered us all together and we knelt in prayer.  After we all got up off our knees, I quickly packed a bag and left to go help them out, as they had asked my parents if I would be able to come stay with them and care for their other 7 children for a time.   That day started me down a journey that will be forever life changing.

Through the past year I have traveled out of state to help their family many times as they traveled down this road that God was taking them down.  And the more I spend time with them, helping them, the more I realize what families with cancer patients go through on a daily basis.  I am sure I still don’t understand or realize even a small amount of what they go through, but the weeks that I have been able to be with them, walking down this road with them, has really opened my eyes in so many different ways.  I can honestly say that I was ignorant before about even a small amount of what is involved when one has a child with cancer. The rollercoaster rides, the emotional battle, the physical battle, the work, the pain of watching them go through it all knowing that they may never “win” that battle here on earth…I can’t even begin to describe what it is like for these families, on a daily basis.  There are just no adequate words for it all. It is a very, very hard road to walk down.  Yet, sometimes God calls us to walk down these roads, as much as we may never understand why that is.  And I have certainly learned a great deal from it.

These past two weeks that I was away helping this dear family out, are two weeks that I will never forget, and as much as it was two weeks of emotional ups and downs and filled with so many unknowns, it was also two weeks that were filled in a very special, fulfilling way for me.  It changed my life and something came alive that I had almost forgotten about. 

My friends, those two weeks, albeit they were hard at times…very hard…were filled with memories that I will forever hold close to my heart.  It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about them all. How I love that little girl!  These two weeks were just filled with my being able to hold her, read to her, play with her, sing to her, walk with her, give her her medicine and pray over her as I held her close to my heart.  And it was then, that I realized that God had answered the longing of my heart…here I was, doing just what I have always longed to do…be with and help children and their families who are suffering from cancer! Although the road isn’t always easy, I have to honestly say that it has been ever so rewarding for me and I don’t regret having to walk down this road with them one bit.

Sarah wasn’t the only child I got to be around, either.  I got to meet many children who are suffering from different cancers.  I even got to play with some of them, too, although nothing like I did with Sarah.  I got to meet their parents and some of their siblings. I found myself constantly thinking of all of them, praying constantly for them, anxious to get up in the morning and check in on all of them and see how they are all doing, etc.

It was then that I also found myself kneeling before their couch one night, thanking God from the depths of my heart that He had set me aside to answer such a need - He had allowed me to stay single for such a time as this.

My dear friends, had I been married with a family of my own, I would just have never been able to do half of what I have been able to do this past year, where Sarah and the others are concerned.  It has brought me such joy to have the privilege to minister to God in such a way as this!  Yes, I very much look forward to one day being a wife and mama…anyone who knows me, knows this to be true.  Yet, as the years go by, and I think about all that I have been able to do for God’s kingdom while I have been single, I have no regrets at all. I have thoroughly enjoyed (atleast most of the time!) my single years, BECAUSE they have also been filled with going about God’s business.  My single years have been filled to brimming, and it has only proven to show me just how much we as singles could be doing to impact this world for Christ.  There is SO much that we could be doing, that only we as single older daughters could do.  Our mothers can not, simply because they are busy caring for our families…they are serving God in ways that we simply could not, either.  We each have our duty, the question is, are we doing it? When you get married sometime in the future, will you look back on your single years and have regrets that you wish you could go back and undo?